Well, they're speaking up now because now there is an atmosphere of acknowledgment of how pervasive this kind of thing is. Also - and I'm sure you would agree - after the fact it's easy to say "you should have spoken up" or something. But in the moment most of us are caught off guard and don't have words ready on our lips. Also, women are accultured to play along, to be nice, to give in, not to make a fuss. I think it's all those things that crowd up in a woman's throat and make her feel powerless - not necessarily the act itself.

Me, the time a stranger grabbed my ass in a bar I backhanded him, on instinct. If I'd had a baseball bat he'd've been dead. But I have REALLY strong boundaries. I don't expect other women to react the way I did - nor would I necessarily recommend it! It didn't get the jerk to back off. He kept harassing me (following me around, trying to "talk" to me) until I asked my male band mates to threaten his life. That sort of worked.

What can you do? But no - I get the way a person, especially a woman, can freeze up and assume everyone will blame her for making a fuss over nothing, or call her a liar or a bitch. It's happened to pretty much every single woman who has come out with her assault or rape story.